Ex-Periences

My first alone day for one whole week didn't turn out as good as I had hoped. When I am alone my thoughts run wild, usually in a negative way.

The boy from 'Dancing Butterflies' has stuck around. I've never met anyone like him before and I'm glad that I have. I am worried about how much I like him, again I will say that I didn't expect to meet anyone I would like in this way and as much as I have gotten and still do get butterflies I have started to now get some minor anxiety. The anxiety is because of my past experiences with boys and I don't want to repeat any of the same mistakes I made in the past. Also some of my experiences has made it hard for me to trust people, especially people who say they like me in some way.

The last few days I have also been thinking about my ex boyfriend. With some of the dramas that have been happening recently in my life the past few weeks regarding friendships I think I miss the unchanging and most comfortable feeling of being with someone for a long amount of time. I've resisted the urge to call my ex but tonight I sent an SMS to his mobile which he hasn't replied to.

I would of thought I'd have more to write about, I know I do, I'm just having a hard time getting the words out. Unless I'm too worried about certain people reading this. But I need to just not care. But I get worried I will scare people away.

I'm guessing my word of the week is 'worried'.