Sometimes I will stare at my face in the mirror until the edges start to fade to black. I try to avoid mirrors because of how badly I criticize my appearance. Most of the time I look at myself and think that I don't look normal, that somehow I seem to look not even human or devoid of gender. I often find myself comparing everything about my appearance to other people I see and think that they are so much better in every way.
My negativity about myself is a huge problem. I believe that because I lack attractiveness I need to make up for it with my personality except I can't even do that because of my social anxiety. So in the end I just believe I am a complete failure.
This is a habit I wish I could break.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
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Hope everything is going well - is it your birthday yet?
ReplyDeleteDefinitely hope things are looking up a bit.
Today is my birthday. Pissed off that not a single one of wes' friends who I have been friends with for 5 years even said happy birthday to me.
ReplyDeleteTime to make brand new friends I think.
Not sure why you feel so insecure about your own appearance.
ReplyDeleteYou look great to me.